After extensive detective work, I discovered that there WAS a band called The Clash. They were this obscure British band who totally ripped off Rancid. They were really obscure, though, and looked like big enough pussies that they wouldn't sue me over using their name, though, so I kept it. But man, they had great song and record titles, so it seemed like a great idea to use them, too! So the first performance of The Clash was to be entitled "Overpowered By Funk". I got out my trusty Dr. Pad drum synth, a bunch of 7-second cassette tape loops of such highlights of early 90's thrash-funk such as Limbomaniacs, Psychefunkapus, and 24-7 Spyz, grabbed my life-sized cardboard cutout homie Jesus, and the finest in early 90's vintage thrash-funk garb, and got ready to Rock! And Funk!
are you sacrificing a piece of equipment to ensure a good show????
(Sat 06 Mar 2004 16:49:52 PST)
So, I was up there, opening for Canuck rock gods THE EVAPORATORS and the "blue-eyed" 60's soul revival of HAROLD RAY: LIVE IN CONCERT, and I was dropping that funky funkiness to the max! In fact, as the cacophony of funk grew to deafning levels, I was feeling completely overpowered by funk - So overpowered, in fact, that I had to enscribe FUNK in huge flaming rubbing alcohol letters all over the ground and slide right through it! Boy, was I ever feeling like one of those Red Hot Chili Pepper Smokin' Rhythm Prawns at that moment! It was like someone had lit a Primus under my ass (you know, one of those little Swedish camping stoves). Immolated by the power of blue-eyed FUNK, indeed!
So, in the end, all I got were a bunch of 2nd degree burns over my right hand and 40% of my lower back, but I got to play with THEE EVAPORATORS and that plus the power of BAD FUNK made it all worth it! --John Geek, AKA THE CLASH!