Nardwuar the Human Serviette Radio Show!

Transcribed Interviews

Nardwuar vs. Waka Flocka Flame

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Nardwuar the Human Serviette vs. Waka Flocka Flame

Nardwuar: Who are you?

Waka Flocka Flame: I’m Waka Flocka. Born in Jamaica, Queens, raised in Clayton County, Riverdale, spokesman, entrepreneur, juggernaut, you know, the rest goes on.

Nardwuar: Waka Flocka, welcome to Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada.

WFF: Man, I love it man. Thank you man. Van city.

Nardwuar: And Waka, who do you have beside you?

WFF: Wooh Da Kid, man. My brother.

Wooh Da Kid: What’s going on? Wooh Da Kid, Wooh Da King, King Wooh, whatever you want to call me.

Nardwuar: So right off the bat I have a gift for you to welcome you guys to Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada.

WFF: We always love gifts. What’s happening?

Nardwuar: We have something here that is dear to your heart right now, an SWV LP.

[Nardwuar hands WFF an SWV record]

WFF: How do you know we like SWV?

Nardwuar: You’re Waka Flocka. We gotta know that.

WFF: How do you know that?

Nardwuar: What can you tell the people about SWV?

Wooh: They sexy. Real nice [dances back and forth].

Nardwuar: How important is that, Waka Flocka?

WFF: Well SWV, they remind me of a club in Queens called Colors. Like everybody from Queens, they know the club called Colors. That is what you just reminded me of, man you just reminded me of block parties, man. I appreciate this.

Nardwuar: Waka Flocka and Wooh Da Kid, here you are in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada, as I mentioned. I guess I was wondering there, Waka, do you still like salt & vinegar chips?

WFF: Yo, this guy’s crazy! How do you know that, man? I love them. Them’s my favorite chips.

Nardwuar: You know, I was thinking about vinegar, and I was thinking about barbecue. For barbecue, what is your favorite barbecue? You know, there’s like vinegar-based barbecue, mustard-based barbecue and ketchup-based barbecue. What’s your guys’ favorites?

WFF: Damn. You know them all. Yo man, this guy’s like Cleo, man. Yeah, I love it. You hit them all on the nose.

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Nardwuar vs. E-40

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Nardwuar The Human Serviette vs Nardwuar vs. E-40

Nardwuar: Who are you?

E-40: I go by the name a’ E-Feasible-Bellafonte-Bearweather-Bellagiano, y’understand me?

Nardwuar: E-40, welcome to Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada.

E-40: Right on, thank you for having me, man.

Nardwuar: E-40, what’s the importance of the Beverly Food Center?

E-40: Beverly Food Center? That’s in my neighborhood, that’s on the hillside, that’s not there no more, it’s another, it’s called something else, but yeah, that man do, that’s one of them days when, shoot, I’m thinkin’ three thou-wow-wow with you, y’understand me. Mums, mums used to make me go get like, when I was a kid, I had to go… go pick up embarrassing stuff for her cos we had a credit over there, like, “Go down to Mr Jimmy’s and get…,” y’understand me, “go get me um… uh… some tampons or something,” you know what I mean. I was a kid so I had to go do it! But you, you’re pride in a way, but I say, “But mum, I don’t wanna do that,” but I had to do it, you know what I mean, stuff like that, I mean… shoot man, Beverly Food Center was… it was the hood, man, that’s the soil, you know, and Mr Jimmy and his hot tamales, that’s what he had down there.

Nardwuar: Some of the Macks hang out down there too, right?

E-40: Yeah, yeah, a lot of people hang out there. Some of the, you know, all the OGs, you know, used to hang out there, you know, when I started, y’understand me, drinking, kids, don’t do this, but I used to slide, y’understand me, a OG little bread there, give me 40 ounce, y’understand me, when I was under-age, little bit, but don’t do that dow, don’t do dat, don’t do dat.

Nardwuar: E-40, Bay Area Old School, what can you tell the people about Calvin T and Magic Mike?

E-40: Oh, whee, the rawest rappers you never heard of, ever in life, from Richmond, California, yeah, you dig. And man, I went and psyched Calvin T, probably ’96, something like that, and um, my partner, y’understand me, he got caught up y’understand, he had to do some time, but I got a little form to this day, man, you know, that dude was… he still got gas, y’understand me. You can find him on the block where sure four, five, or six albums that I’ve come with in March two-thou-wow-thirteen, y’understand me, so… man, c’mon man, it was the people I grew up on, Calvin T and Magic Mike, Too Short, Freddie B, Ice T, KRS-1, Run DMC…

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Nardwuar vs. Bushwick Bill

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Nardwuar The Human Serviette vs Nardwuar vs. Bushwick Bill

Nardwuar: Who are you?

Bushwick Bill: My mother’s child [laughs].

Nardwuar: You are Bushwick Bill.

Bushwick Bill: Yeah, I’m Bushwick Bill, how you doing [laughs]?

Nardwuar: Bushwick Bill, welcome to SXSW, Austin Texas, where you do not live.

Bushwick Bill: No, I do not live here, but it is where music lives, so I guess technically I am living here.

Nardwuar: Bushwick Bill, right off the bat, I wanted to ask you about this particular record right here, First Priority, Basement Flavor [Nardwuar hands a LP to Bill]. What can you tell the people about it?

Bushwick Bill: About First Priority? Are you talking about MC Lyte, Mom and Dad record label with Audio 2 and the rest of these characters?

Nardwuar: Indeed, yes, Michie Mee from Canada.

Bushwick Bill: Well, really what I like about this record right here, personally, is that it shows diversity and flavour. And if you think about it, Audio Two, 50 Cent just sampled them three years ago and went platinum again on that beat, and so did Mary J Blige sing on the same beat that Audio Two did, Milk is Chillin’. So the beats off this album have been multi platinum since this album came out, with other artists rapping over the same beat.

Nardwuar: Bushwick Bill, you started as a dancer in New York, at the Swatch Watch competition?

Bushwick Bill: Yes. I am a breakdancing genius. [Laughs]. Actually, when I was younger, I was into grafitti, breakdancing, and DJing, and then later on found out I could rap. But I am part
of the 5 elements of hip-hop, as far as breakdancing, producing, DJing and writing grafitti, yeah, it’s all the same.

Nardwuar: What were the dances? The Jerry Lewis, the Pee-wee Herman, the Smurf. What were the dances?

Bushwick Bill: Yeah, those were all of the dances right there, including the original moves that we would make up during breakdancing, you know what I mean? Like the headspin into the windmill, you know what I mean? It’s just, now that I am older, I feel all those pains in my joints [laughs].

Nardwuar: Bushwick Bill, the early days of Bushwick Bill, the Rhinestone Wrangler. You worked at the Rhinestone Wrangler. What was the Rhinestone Wrangler?

Bushwick Bill: [Laughs]. Well, first it was the Rhinestone Wrangler, then it was the Thunderdome, but I was a busboy with DJ – rest in peace – DJ Lonnie Mack. The biggest act back then was Captain Jack and DJ Lonnie Mack, and Lonnie Mack got me a job there, and I was a busboy. And every time I would finish cleaning up the glasses and stuff around the club that people were finished with, and they would put on any beats from New York, and I would get out there and start lockin’ and poppin’ and doing the Smurf and the Jerry Lewis and the Pee-wee Herman and you name it.

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Nardwuar vs. Wu-Tang Clan

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Nardwuar The Human Serviette vs Wu-Tang Clan

Nardwuar: Who are you?

RZA: I’m me, yo. The zig zag zane, born the zig zag zig a law, the RZA, aka Bobby Steels, Bobby Digital, you know what I’m saying? RFD, know what I mean, the scientist, the Rzarector, the Abbott, you know what I mean? They say there is 99 names of a law, right, I’ve got 16 so far baby, I’m working on it.

Nardwuar: Wu-Tang Clan, live in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada. And who is beside you? Can you introduce, who do we have in the room right now, RZA?

RZA: Well, we’ve got a lot of people in the room, you know what I mean? Can I curse? Alright, cool. I like this. Okay the first of all, come on.

Ghostface Killah: You know me. You know me. You know me.

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Nardwuar vs. Snoop Dogg (2016)

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Nardwuar the Human Serviette vs. Snoop Doggy Dogg (2016)

Nardwuar: Who are you?

Snoop Dogg:My name is Snoop Dogg. West Coast, hip hop, gangsta rapper, actor, father, football coach, philanthropist.

Nardwuar: The best of all time.

Snoop Dogg:Believe it.

Nardwuar: That’s what usually you say in the 7 other interviews that we’ve done, 7 plus 1, this is the 8th interview.

SnoopDogg: It’s the 8th wonder of the world man, anytime you can do 8 interviews with Nardwuar you must say that this is the 8th wonder of the world.

Nardwuar: Ba-boom.

Snoop Dogg: Bam Bam.

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Nardwuar vs. Jane Wiedlin

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Nardwuar: Who are you?
Jane Wiedlin: Oh, Jesus! (laughs) I don’t know! Can you be a little more specific?

Nardwuar: You are Jane Wiedlin!
Jane Wiedlin: Oh, okay. I thought you wanted, like, some analysis of myself.

Nardwuar: You are Jane Wiedlin!
Jane Wiedlin: Okay, that’s an easy answer. I’m Jane Wiedlin.

Nardwuar: But, Jane, you were once known as Jane Draino, and had pink hair!
Jane Wiedlin: Uh, yeah, I’ve actually had every colour hair.

Nardwuar: What type of hair spray did you use?
Jane Wiedlin: Well, we used to be bleach our hair out and use this stuff called Crazy Colour that was like a temporary dye, and it would look good for about a week, and then it would start looking really nasty and you would have to redo it.

Nardwuar: Are you going to be using any of that in your upcoming reunion tour, Jane Wiedlin?
Jane Wiedlin: Mmmm, probably not. The last reunion tour, which was 1994-1995, I had my hair green and then blue and it’s such a pain in the ass and it leaves colour everywhere you go so I think in every hotel I was in I just ruined every room and, it’s kind of not really worth it.

Nardwuar: Jane, The International New Wave Discography Volume II describes you this way under the Go-Go’s entry, “…used to be called Jane Draino, before the band became terminally ‘cute’.”
Jane Wiedlin: (laughs)

CLICK HERE FOR NARDWUAR VS. JANE WIEDLIN !

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